Hinamatsuri March 3, 2007
Posted by Kristen in Holiday, Japanese Culture, Kids.2 comments
Today is Girls’ Day, also known as Hinamatsuri (Doll’s Festival). Japanese families with daughters put up a special display of dolls including the Emperor and Emperess and various members of the court. Isabella celebrated the festival in school by making this origami version of the display, including a bowl for the special hinamatsuri snack:
(Isabella did all of the writing. The four characters on the lower left-hand side spell her name.)
Yesterday, we were invited to a special Girls’ Day party at the home of Isabella’s friend Rimi from school. Rimi’s family is all Japanese but her English is nearly fluent and her mother Misa speaks English very well. So they often socialize with the rest of us Anglophones, which is really great for everyone, adults and kids alike. They have an apartment in the city near where we live, but spend weekends in their larger house which is much further away. I should note that this larger house has 2 floors: Misa’s in-laws live on the ground floor and her family of 4 live on the second floor. Each floor is about 1000 square feet. Then they divided up the small garden to build another small house within it for Misa’s parents. The large suburban house is still very tiny.
We took 2 trains and a bus to get there, and still found ourselves in a completely urban area. I was very relieved to find that the bus had an LED display that showed the names of each stop, in English as well as Japanese. It was the farthest I had yet ventured within Tokyo and I was alone with both Isabella and Juliet. Aside from the fact that Juliet hated sitting on my lap on the bus (and kept pushing the “request stop” button), it went very well. I was very proud of us!
We had a really nice afternoon. The group included 3 other famlies we have gotten to know over the course of the year, part of the small group of English-speaking families at Isabella’s school. There was Severine with her daughters Carla and Elisa, who are French. When they arrived a year and a half ago, the girls spoke neither English nor Japanese (the two languages used in school). Severine speaks English well, and the girls are finally willing to speak a little English with their friends. Then there was Henrietta with her children Arthur (a special exception, he was allowed to come for Girls’ Day), Iffy (short for Iphigenie) and Abigail. Henrietta’s parents are English but she was raised in France, and the children have spent their childhood in Switzerland and Japan. And then there was one more Japanese family. I keep forgetting the name of the mother, who understands some English but does not speak any. Her daughter Akane goes to school with the other children, and she also has a granddaughter Koko who is exactly Juliet’s age.
We ate a traditional lunch including charishi sushi, a sort of deconstructed sushi which consists of vinegared rice in an open dish with various ingredients scattered on top: this one had cooked egg, daikon radish, lotus root and salmon roe. The kids wolfed down some onigiri (rice balls) and ran off to play together while we grownups enjoyed our meal with a bit more leisure.
The real highlight of the day, however, was trying on some of the many kimonos that Rimi’s family has collected over the years. With an experienced grandmother on hand to do all of the complex tying, both Isabella and I had the honor of wearing these beautiful traditional dresses.
Here is the lovely young lady with her elegant hairstyle.
Here I am being wrapped up by Rimi’s grandmother. Although these dresses are loose in the waist and have no corset, they are bound very tightly around the ribcage. Not only is it difficult to walk in one, but it’s rather hard to breathe as well! I was told that it’s very difficult to sit in a regular chair when dressed in a kimono, and much easier to kneel on the floor Japanese-style (which makes perfect sense, of course).
Of course we had to take lots of pictures in the garden.
And here are the elaborate obi (ties):
This picture includes both grandmothers and the other little girls who were willing to try on kimonos, Elisa and Carla, along with their mother Severine.
Isabella was disappointed that the other girls preferred to dig in the dirt! She carefully waddled out to talk to them.
Little Abigail, at 2-1/2, was persuaded to don this adorable robe for a few minutes.
There was one tiny kimono for Juliet and Koko to try, but neither wanted anything to do with it. They were pretty content throwing small stones into a bucket together and otherwise playing in the dirt.
One of the funniest cross-cultural scenes of the day was observing little Abigail, with her blonde curls, giving instructions to Juliet in Japanese as they played together.
At the end of the afternoon, Misa offered to drive us to the train station where we could catch the subway line that comes directly back to our neighborhood so that we could avoid the trying bus ride. It was a comfortable 50-minute ride on the train. As we rumbled along, I told Isabella that this was exactly why we decided to send her to the New International School. We wanted her to have a chance to meet Japanese friends and experience real Japanese culture. What a privilege it was to get to be a part of this day.
Isabella thinks we should invite Rimi’s family over for Thanksgiving next year.
Returning from Hiatus January 19, 2007
Posted by Kristen in Food, Holiday, Japanese Culture, Kids, Kyoto, Travel.add a comment
Somehow it seems that with this sort of thing, the longer you go without doing it, the harder it is to start again. Kind of like exercising. When I started working on this entry, it had been one month since I last I last published. Now it has been almost two! I find it to be a real challenge to both live my life here–to explore and experience Japan–and also to chronicle it for friends, family and posterity. How do real writers do it?
And so, without further ado, here is a condensed version of our holidays:
Christmas. Santa Claus came and brought Japanese gifts and stockings. The children were spoiled once again and had a grand time. Juliet, delightfully free of expectations, was a joy to watch as she encountered each new toy with surprise and wonder. We made our traditional Christmas dinner of meat fondue.
Mark had to work on the 25th, so the rest of us walked to his office and had a Japanese lunch on the 39th Floor of his office building, overlooking the city.
The major holiday was the New Year, when the entire city seems to shut down for 3 days. We started out with a sushi-making afternoon on the 31st, trying out the new sushi cookbook Mark gave me for Christmas. It turned out not to be too difficult and came out great! Isabella was the experienced sushi chef, having tried it out on a school field trip to an amusement park called Kidzania where the kids get to try out different real-life jobs (see pictures here and read about it in English here here). She insisted on rolling hers up by hand without using a bamboo mat.
After a few quiet days at home, we headed to the train station for our first journey by 
Shinkansen to Kyoto. The train seems very ordinary and doesn’t feel much different from a regular train, but the journey takes just over 2 hours (this would be more impressive if I knew the distance travelled, but I don’t!). We soon learned why most Japanese ship their bags ahead of time rather than carry them on board: there is very little room for luggage on the train! With Mark’s help, we managed to heave our big suitcase precariously onto the rack above the seats. (You can see in the picture how small they are.)
Our first sightseeing outing took us to Rokuon-ji Temple and its shimmering Golden Pavilion. The building is entirely covered in gold leaf and its image is reflected in the surrounding pool. Although you can’t go inside, we spent quite awhile walking around the beautiful grounds.
I think it was here that we found this delightfully whimsical set of statues all dressed up for the New Year. I think they are the statues of the ancestors, awaiting their New Year’s mochi) treat.
Next we moved onto Roanji Temple which has a beautiful and serene Zen rock garden and a lovely pond. My photos can’t do justice to the rock garden, so check out the link and read about its history! We pondered this sign for awhile. A Zen message?
The next day, we visited Nijo Castle. Although the original castle was built by the shogun Tokugawa Ieyasu in 1602, it was destroyed by fire. The current building was once part of the Kyoto Imperial Palace and was moved to the site around 1890. A bit confusing. We were able to walk through this building and see the beautiful painted panels and ceilings in the interior rooms. Some rooms were set up with life-sized figures depicting palace life. I was amused by the scene showing an audience with the shogun: everyone is seated kneeling on the floor, facing him. What distinguishes his status and privileged position is that he gets to kneel on a cushion and rest one arm on a wooden armrest. Now that’s luxury! Another fun feature of this castle is its “nightingale floors” which squeak under even the softest sock-clad tread in order to alert the inhabitants of any intrusion, even by the nearly silent Ninja. It makes for an interesting effect when all the tourists are passing through.
On our last day we visited Kiyomizu-dera temple, 
tucked into the hills on the edge of the city. You approach the temple up a road lined with shops then climb up the stairs to see the beautiful buildings and view the peaceful wooded hills beyond. It was especially nice to be able to see out, beyond city and buildings. We can never see beyond the city in Tokyo. We also enjoyed visiting the shops on the street below and found several beautiful pieces of pottery to bring home.
We had a couple of memorable meals on this trip. The first was in the Japanese restaurant at our hotel. We had a table in a private room, which was ideal with Juliet, and ordered one of their set menus. There were many different courses, perhaps 7 or 8 in all, each small, beautifully arranged and artfully presented. There was sashimi, some cooked fish, many kinds of pickles, new and unusual vegetables. One course had salmon roe presented in a tiny hollowed-out orange peel. Juliet especially liked these! There were many things we didn’t recognize, but the only thing we all refused to try was the sea urchin offal. Given the choice, I think I’d take a pass on that one again.
Our other fine meal was in a Japanese restaurant recommended by the hotel. It was a small restaurant, old and wonderfully atmospheric. This time we sat at a low table, which would have been ideal with Juliet–except that it was the kind with the pit underneath to make it easier for people who are unused to kneeling. I spent most of the meal worrying that Juliet would fall into it! She had a grand time, though, crawling towards the sushi bar and making friends with the sushi chef. We enjoyed some fine sashimi again and wonderful grilled meats, plus an outstanding rolled omelette.
After two and a half days, it was time to get back on the bullet train and return to Tokyo. Unlike our trip to Saipan in November, this time it was not so difficult and confusing to come home. We had a quiet weekend at home before the workweek began and Isabella went back to school after her luxurious 3-week winter break. After all that time, Juliet was sad to lose the company of her big sister.
Christmas Scenes around Town December 20, 2006
Posted by Kristen in Holiday, Tokyo Adventures.add a comment
I know that everyone has been wondering what Christmas is like in Tokyo. So here are some pictures to give you an idea of what it’s like here this time of year.
Some of the leaves have fallen, but there’s still plenty of color. It feels strange to prepare for Christmas when it feels like mid-October.
There are a lot of Christmas decorations up around town, and they have been up since early November. The Japanese seem to like Christmas but have no sentimental attachment to it. Here are some of the Christmas decorations from the big shopping area in Shibuya:
Some of the decorations are pretty silly. Juliet loves these singing dwarves, as do all the children who pass by. You often see kids standing next to them as in this picture. They are inflated by some kind of air hose and their heads bob up and down to the music. I found this a very strange sight. First of all, they’re the Disney dwarves from Snow White. Secondly, they are “singing” a random collection of soft pop songs. And finally, as I realized a few days ago, the music comes from a stereo that is left unattended outside 24 hours a day. It may be bolted down, but it has not been damaged, harmed or vandalized in an way.
And here is the equally silly inflatable Santa which, like the dwarves, is at the main intersection of Hiroo a few blocks away. He also has music, though he doesn’t bob.
Many of the decorations are understated and elegant, as this Christmas tree in a nearby shop window.
Christmas is not a time for family; it is a time for going out and for parties. Here are some of the things you can buy to prepare for a party:
We plan to have a fairly traditional family Christmas at home. We will have to do most of our celebrating on Christmas Eve, however, because Christmas Day is a regular work day and Mark will have to go to work. We considered buying a real tree when they were available at National Azabu, but quickly decided it was ridiculous to pay over $300 (plus delivery and removal). So instead I bought a nice-looking artificial tree that we can fold up and put away until next year. We are decorating the tree with origami ornaments, most of which have survived Juliet’s exploration. I will write more after Christmas and tell you how it all went.
Merry Christmas to everyone!
Thanksgiving November 29, 2006
Posted by Kristen in Food, Holiday.add a comment
It seemed especially important to me that we keep up American holiday traditions while in this new land. So I decided to cook Thanksgiving dinner. And I didn’t stop at that. Feeling inspired by having met new people in the building and at Isabella’s school, I decided we should have guests. This is not something I’m used to doing. It all came out very nice and we had a good visit, but what an undertaking! I tip my hat to my mother and all the amazing, elaborate meals she has made over the years.
I managed to get all the ingredients for the dinner at National Azabu, the international supermarket that is very close by. Nothing pre-made to be had, however, so I did the whole thing from scratch. Took me about 3 days to prepare and 2 to clean up! Since I couldn’t call my mother with last-minute questions, as I always do, I managed with web searches. The turkey was frozen, of course, so I was glad I bought it on Sunday and found out right away that it would take 3 days to thaw. Besides turkey with stuffing and gravy, we had mashed potatoes, baked yams (purple ones!), mushrooms sauteed with marsala and cream (shiitake and other Japanese varieties) and green beans (because I have a method for blanching them ahead of time). I made pumpkin cheesecake, and then, because we had 4 guests, an apple pie, too. What’s really amazing is that I managed to do a lot ahead of time, I didn’t panic, and everything came out just fine. Be very impressed.
Our guests were Isabella’s friend Eric from school, his mother Miki (born in Japan and moved to the U.S. at 14), Eric’s father and ex-husband of Miki, Johan, who is Swedish, and Miki’s boyfriend, Kevin, who is Irish. A most unusual family grouping! It appears they all get along quite well and often socialize together. Isabella and Eric did well at the formal table, then enjoyed playing together in the den while the grown-ups chatted. Eric was great with Juliet, as well.
It’s awfully nice to have non-Americans as guests for Thanksgiving dinner because they’re so impressed by everything and have no preconceived notions of what the dinner ought to be. Miki was fascinated by the gravy-making process. She had never seen a turkey neck before and was amazed at how we made use of all the extra parts. All of the adult guests chose the apple pie for dessert because they thought that was the most “American.” We topped it all off with espresso from our new DeLonghi espresso maker, which seemed to be the best part of all. They were delighted to have real espresso and complimented us on our cups, the mismatched china demitasse cups we bought in Geneva. A nice international touch to our American holiday.
It was a terriffic dinner and a lovely afternoon. And now I think I’ll take the next 2 weeks or so off from cooking. Good thing I finally figured out how to order Domino’s online!
Bullies and Witches November 7, 2006
Posted by Kristen in Holiday, Kids, School.add a comment
It is such a challenge to keep up with this journal, and always difficult to decide what to write about. Sometimes when big things happen, I am so tired out by dealing with the event itself that I have no energy left to write about it. How do real writers do this?
Just when things start to get settled in part of my life here, it seems I can free up space to deal with the other parts that I have pushed aside. And then I can get knocked for a loop all over again.
I had not been involved in Isabella’s school at all, and knew very little about what was going on in her class. So when they had a Field Day recently, I decided to go and check it out.
On Friday October 27, I packed up Juliet and a picnic lunch and went to Isabella’s school for Field Day. The children spent almost the whole day at a nearby elementary school (which seems to be no longer in use as a school) that has outdoor space with a tr
ack. They were put into groups mixed by age and competed in lots of different activities. Some seemed more fun than others, but the ended with a tug-of-war tournament that everyone seemed to enjoy. Up until this point, I had only been to school twice: on Isabella’s first day to drop her off, and for her birthday to serve cupcakes. It was nice to spend the day there and meet some of the other parents. They were dismissed early and several of us went to a nearby park. I had a chance to visit with several other mothers and Isabella had fun playing with other kids, something she has had very little opportunity to do because of the long school day and long bus ride. Juliet fared well even though she missed both naps, enjoying the company of all the big kids, and crawling in the dirt.
It was fortunate that I met and spoke to the other moms on Friday, because on Saturday morning I got a call from one of them. She asked if I had been aware that one of the girls in Isabella’s class had put her shirt in the toilet on Thursday afternoon. It seems that several of the girls had been called back to school on Friday afternoon after Field Day and questioned by the teachers. Somehow, however, nobody thought to let me in on it, even though I had been there all day. Needless to say, it was all pretty upsetting and I was pretty angry with the teachers. I was also upset because Isabella had been telling me things that had happened in school, and I realized that I hadn’t been paying close enough attention. Her first few days, everyone wanted to be her friend and they used to argue about who got to sit next to her. But then, quite suddenly, it stopped. It seems that this one girl was jealous of her and decided that she would make the others stop paying attention to her. She started some sort of negative campaign against Isabella which included stealing things and telling others Isabella had done it, and probably even threatening the girls if they tried to be friendly to her. The shirt in the toilet was the last straw. I finally understood what had been going on and I hit the roof. Then I had to spend the rest of the weekend recovering and decompressing, waiting until I could talk to someone at school on Monday.
I was pleasantly surprised when I spoke to the principal (who is American ) on Monday and found that he understood that there was real bullying going on and agreed that it was very serious. I arranged to go in on Tuesday and meet with both of Isabella’s teachers and then with the teachers and principal together. It is a tricky problem, including language and cultural differences as well as plain old-fashioned bullying. Still, the meeting went well. The teachers apologized for not talking to me sooner and said they were making some immediate and obvious changes, such as only letting one child go to the bathroom at a time. The principal has had real experience with bullying when he taught in public school in Glasgow and seemed to have good, sensible ideas about what to do and what not to do. In addition, he seems kind and approachable and I think the kids feel comfortable talking to him. I was really impressed with how he handled the situation. The next day (or was it later that day?), two of the girls apologized to Isabella in front of the class. She is content that it’s all over and done with, but I’m still wary. I still don’t trust the girl who has been the ringleader and it’s hard to know which of the other girls will tend to be fearful followers and which will be true friends.
Although it was exhausting, in the end I was glad that this whole shirt incident took place. It was so outrageous that it made everyone stand up and take notice, and got everyone involved. Now, hopefully, it will get better. And I will make an effort to spend more time at school and make sure Isabella has more time to play with her friends outside of school, out of the reach of the bully.
This led us right into Halloween. Although Noriko told me that Japanese children don’t go trick-or-treating, we saw several groups of them wandering through our neighborhood in full costume. Maybe they’ve discovered this is the place to come, with all the Americans here? Isabella was invited to go with her friend Eric in his apartment building nearby. It is a huge building with lots of Americans and Eric’s mom promised lots of loot. I tried to get a picture of the two of them together, but Juliet was afraid of Eric’s Space Alien mask and he had to hide it until they left! I stayed in the apartment with Juliet and Eric’s mom while Isabella and Eric went in search of treats. They had a lot of fun going around the building and came back heavily laden with candy, both familiar treats and some strange new ones.
On Wednesday afternoon Isabella had a playdate with a girl from another class at school who lives nearby. Her mother had sent a note home to me asking if she could pick the girls up after school and take them to the park. I met them later and they seemed to have had a very nice time together. They are Japanese and speak English pretty well. The mother seems like a lovely person. She told me that several of the mothers were planning a trip in December to a new theme park and wanted to know if they could take Isabella. I thought it was so nice of them to think of her and ask to include her. It sounds like a fun outing and I’m sure she’ll have a great time.
Tomorrow is Wednesday, the “early” day at school when they get out at 2:50. I’ve decided to go and pick Isabella up from school and take her to the nearby park to play, as I’ve learned that several of her classmates go there every Wednesday afternoon. I plan to make this a regular event, and hope that I can help her get more settled and avoid more major dramas in the future.
Just Pictures October 26, 2006
Posted by Kristen in Holiday, Kids.1 comment so far
Juliet is taking a music class at Gymboree. She wants to play the guitar!
Isabella is dressed for a Halloween parade at school today, as a glamorous witch complete with pink sparkly false eyelashes and nails, purple hair, and a green broom.
